Truth was I was seasick.

OK, so I admit it: I was not initially psyched to take to the seas for a week with my parents and two siblings. I couldn't get the "Love Boat" song out of my head and I was having nightmares starring a demonic Julie McCoy and a Leonardo DiCaprio gone mad. Translation: I was a bit afraid of being water-logged for seven days--and just as frightened of the cheesy cruise images I had floating in my head. But once I made all the arrangements for our Southern Caribbean cruise on Carnival's Fascination, I put my doubts behind me and decided to give cruising a chance. (Finding--and booking--a cruise online was simple, by the way.) After all, what could be so bad? We were going to be visiting five glorious Caribbean islands, there would be food and drink galore, a casino, lots of nightlife, a chance to spend time with my family--and Dad was footing the bill.

All first-time cruisers, none of us knew exactly what to expect, what to pack, or how this ship thing worked. I read through all the detailed info from Carnival, so I was feeling quite confident and comfortable when I arrived in San Juan, Puerto Rico, where the 70,000-ton, 2,000-passenger Fascination was set to embark.

All About Logistics
Most of the people I knew who had taken cruises raved about their experiences. However, a couple of friends did warn me about the lines--lines for just about everything. Needless to say, I expected to be spending lots of time looking at the back of people's heads. Not so on our cruise. Sure there were queues, but I had seen worse at my local Safeway. Overall, the process of boarding the ship--luggage and all--was smooth sailing.

The same can be said of the dozens of times we got off and on the ship throughout the cruise. The credit goes to Carnival. The ship really did run like a well-oiled machine. The entire crew--from cabin steward to waiter to cruise director--were professional, friendly, and helpful at all times. And that holds true for my buddy the captain, as well. (We'll get to that later...)

The most difficult thing for all of us was finding our cabins, there were so many decks, inside cabins, outside cabins, etc. But eventually we found our respective digs, which were a lot roomier than I had imagined. There were two beds, a bathroom (with excellent water pressure,) a dressing table, and a satellite TV. One of our favorite late-night activities was watching "Cruise TV," where many of the activities, shows, and shore excursions from that day were shown again and again. (Talk about entertainment...) Another daily delight came when we entered our cabins in the late afternoon: The room was sparkling and the steward always left a surprise on the bed--a towel in the shape of a funky-looking animal (usually accessorized with a pair of my sunglasses or my sister's baseball cap). It was kind of like terrycloth origami--silly but fun.

Food, Glorious Food
Food on a cruise is a big deal. You eat--a lot. And whenever you want. You can order as many entrees as you desire, devour desserts aplenty, and feast on oodles of French fries if you fancy. Along with three meals a day, there are always special buffets on the Lido Deck, ice-cream socials, pizza, room (cabin) service, and lots more available round-the-clock. So it's no surprise that most people pack on a few pounds during the voyage. I was well aware of the tendency to become a tad porky while on board so I was prepared to shun the sweets and give the cold shoulder to the fluffy pancakes and to-die-for mashed potatoes. (OK, I sampled a bit.)

I didn't starve myself; I ate healthy foods, and I was always satisfied. All the meals I consumed at Table Nine in the Sensation Dining Room were yummy. I especially looked forward to indulging in a few pieces of the delicious fresh bread they served at dinner. (The pesto rolls were my personal favorite.) And the choice of soups, appetizers, entrees, and desserts was quite eclectic. Like every family, mine has distinct gastronomic quirks, but we all managed to order something to sate our stomachs: There was plenty of seafood for Dad; lots of vegetarian offerings for my brother, and plenty of pasta--without cream sauce--for Mom. All in all, I was quite impressed with the cuisine, and the service of the waiters and busboys (who regularly performed song-and-dance numbers at dinner).

At the Captain's Table
But without a doubt, my favorite dinner came in the form of a well-done, end piece of prime rib. (I know, I know, you're supposed to eat it rare--but consider this one of my food peculiarities.) The shrimp cocktail and caesar salad that preceded it and the light chocolate soufflé that followed were superb, as well. But, perhaps, the best part of this meal was the company: It was the first "formal" dinner, a.k.a. Captain's Night--and my family had the honor of sitting with the captain himself. (A hearty thanks to my co-workers who made this possible.)

Boy, were my parents impressed when we got a personal invite to sit with the captain and several other senior crew, including the chief engineer and the hotel manager. Dressed in our nice duds, we entered the dining room and were escorted to the Captain's Table by one of the head waiters. The table, with a beautiful floral centerpiece, was gorgeous. And there were place cards. My mother and I had the honor of sitting on either side of Captain Gianpaolo Casula. Needless to say, the Italian captain entertained us with interesting stories of his life as a seafarer. We chatted, ate, toasted, and had our photo taken as a memento of the occasion. It was a good time all around. One of the most interesting tidbits I learned that night? The world record for the most lobster tails eaten at one sitting on a Carnival ship was a whopping 10.

From Ship to Shore
Sure, dining took up much of our days and nights, but there was so much other stuff to do--or not do--aboard the ship. From suntanning to swimming, bingo to blackjack, spa treatments to shopping, daily life on the Fascination was indeed a tad stressful: After all, every morning we had to decide what fun activities we were going to participate in that day. Should we take a shore excursion, go shopping for duty-free bargains in the port town of the day, or simply stay aboard, read a book, and sip a banana daiquiri?

My family and I participated in all of the above--some things we did as a clan, some we did in smaller groups or on our own. A few of my offshore highlights: a walking tour of Martinique's historic Fort-de France, a rain forest tour in breathtaking Dominica, and snorkeling in Barbados. (This was probably less a highlight for my sister who got a case of sea lice. More annoying than harmful, sea lice are like little fish bites that leave skin blotchy, red, and itchy for a short time.)

All in all, this was a great family vacation. Even though I may have resisted at first, I definitely came to appreciate life at sea. Voyaging on a cruise can be as high-energy or mellow as you make it. And while you may not become intimately familiar with the ports of call you visit, you certainly get a good taste of each place (enough to decide where you want to go back to).

Now that I'm safely back on land, I'm feeling a bit sick...homesick, that is--for my floating home away from home. •